Punishment and Discipline
What is the difference between discipline and punishment? The other day, after a delicious dessert with my family, my grandson was going around asking members of the family what stories they could tell from their childhood. What amused me, was that when it came my turn, what I remembered the quickest was stories about when I was disciplined!
Then there was the time we stood at the tool shed door and threw stones at a mirror hanging on the far wall; each time we hit and more glass broke, we gleefully shouted, "Seven more years of bad luck!" Our punishment then was to empty our piggy banks and give to the shed's owner all the money we owned. Ouch! I also remember the time I stayed out beyond dark because of the fun we were having sledding down a hill with hard crusted snow. That time I remember the spanking tool - the instrument of torture was a hard plastic hair brush. And there was the time we were not quietly going to sleep and the spanking tool was my father's shoe, which he pressed into service because he could not find the wooden paddle he usually used - he couldn't find it because we had hidden it! Perhaps what made these memories stand out was the pain - isn't it interesting that we most commonly associate pain with punishment? In fact we also tend to identify the one who inflicts the pain as being our enemy - they couldn't possibly love us while hurting us. Whenever our life's path leads through pain and suffering, we too quickly accuse God for, at best not being there to protect us, or at worst, being the One who is inflicting this pain on us, and Satan is always nearby trying to persuade us that God really doesn't love us after all. How many have heard a parent, perhaps your own, say, "I'm doing this because I love you - it hurts me more than you." And the child says "I hate you" as they storm off to their room. Perhaps the distinction between punishment and discipline is simply that of perspective - the child sees as punishment what the parent views as discipline. Listen to what the wise man says:
"Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death." (Proverbs 19:18) So what is the difference, or what is it that distinguishes punishment from discipline? When we look into the Scripture to answer the question, we learn that there are several words used to express these ideas. In addition to the word "punish" (which by the way only is found five times in the New Testament compared with 41 in the Old Testament), there are words such as "chasten" (or "chastise"), "scourge," "revenge," "torment,” and "discipline." To narrow it down a bit, we will look at these two sides of the coin, discipline and punishment. Of course we understand that not only is this a debate regarding our relationship with God, but even in our society the debate goes on as to whether our criminals are to be punished or disciplined. We have given prison guards the title of "correction officers," but most people view prison time not as correction but as punishment. We erroneously say they are "paying their debt to society," when in fact they are causing our society to go deeper in debt! A few years ago the religious leaders in one of our states made the following statement:
Last week when we observed Good Friday by reenacting the Passover Seder, I identified the person who had done the research behind the way we observe the Seder. For our purposes here, let's call him Bill, a man I met in the psychiatric unit of a large Philadelphia Hospital. He was being held in this lock-up unit while waiting for extradition proceedings to be finalized - Bill was wanted in Michigan where he would be required to return to prison due to having broken his parole agreement. The reason Bill was fighting to stay in Pennsylvania was because when he was sentenced several years earlier, he was promised psychological counseling. It didn't happen, and he knew it wouldn't happen if he returned to Michigan. His appeal was successful, and one of the elderly men of the church took him in, and the healing began. That next Sunday night, during a combined service with another congregation, Bill went to the altar. For everyone else there that night, it was a time of celebration, for Bill it was an hour of deepest agony as he cried out to God to save him and heal him. This man who had formerly sexually abused young boys, was transformed by the power of God. A life-time of neglect, hurt and rage was slowly cleansed from his system, a few years later he married and prepared himself to serve as a minister in the Methodist church. Today Bill is retired, but still serving the Lord by conducting services in the housing complex for the elderly. For a long time people like Chuck Colson and other leaders of prison ministries have campaigned to transform penal institutions into correctional facilities, that is, institutions which will bring about rehabilitation rather than punishment. Those who work in those systems, and most of the rest of the American population don't believe it is possible. In fact when Paul touches on this subject in Romans 13, he clearly states that "authorities" exist for the purpose of inflicting "punishment" (verse 4), and for that reason they do not "bear the sword for nothing." But that's on the human plain; what about God's view? When things go wrong in my life, when there is trouble, problems, deprivation, hurt, loss, or any of a number of negative experiences, does it mean that God is punishing me, or disciplining me? The answer is probably "yes". A further study of the New Testament reveals that the most frequently used words for this are: "timoria" (tee-mo-ree'-ah) and "kolazo" (kol-ad'-zo), referring to "punishment," and "paideuw" (paideuo) for discipline.
But the passage which best conveys the idea of the other word, "discipline," is Hebrews 12:5-11. This is a passage that has to do with an exhortation to be faithful in the face of hardships. The chapter opens with a reminder of our great example, Jesus, who endured "opposition." The implication is that when we become victims of others' sins, we should "not grow weary and lose heart." Why? Earlier in Hebrews (5:8), the author makes the point that Jesus, "Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered." So even for Him, the suffering was for learning, or disciplinary purposes. Within the 7 verses of this passage, a form of the word "paideuw" (paideuo) is used seven times. In its most basic form the word means "to train up a child, i.e. educate, or discipline." For example, before being stoned to death, when Deacon Stephen gave his long sermon recounting the history of the people of Israel, he mentioned that "Moses was educated in all the wisdom of the Egyptians and was powerful in speech and action." (Acts 7:22) The word is the same as found when Pilate, believing Jesus was innocent, said, "I have found no cause of death in him: I will therefore chastise him, and let him go" ((Luke 23:22) Pilate didn't want to punish Jesus, he just wanted to teach him a lesson. More in line with what we are trying to understand concerning punishment and discipline, we have this verse in I Corinthians 11:32 "When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world." Peter intimates the same thing when he writes, "judgment begins at the house of God" (I Peter 4:17). If there is to be any moral superiority among Christians, and if our righteousness is to surpass that of the Pharisees (Matthew 5:20), it will be because we have willingly submitted to the discipline, the training provided by the Lord. Perhaps we should read this passage, Hebrews 12:5-11, substituting the word "training" in place of "discipline":
Endure hardship as [training]; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not [trained] by his father? If you are not [trained] (and everyone undergoes [training]), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who [trained] us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers [trained] us for a little while as they thought best; but God [trains] us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No [training] seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." We may summarize the teaching in these four statements:
2. To be corrected is not intended to discourage us - we should endure discipline rejoicing in God's love for us. 3. Ultimately, well trained children come to appreciate and respect their parents for this discipline, and the same should be true of our relationship with God. 4. While the hardships we endure are unpleasant at the time, ultimately they prepare us to share in the very holiness of God and produce the fruits of righteousness and peace. So this is what we have come to understand: whether it's punishment or discipline is a matter of perspective - ours or God's. Many years ago I heard Bill Gothard define wisdom as "seeing life from God's perspective." Too often, our first response to trouble is, "God is punishing me, He doesn't love me, He hates me" - that's a child's perspective. Let's move on to maturity and begin to look at our troubles from God's perspective, even going as far as to accept James' counsel when he writes, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds." (James 1:2) Do you remember the little rhyme, a famous proverb recited in Benjamin Franklin's Poor Richard's Almanac, "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise"? Some people seem to think that you don't need to go to bed early, or get up early. To be "healthy, wealthy and wise" all you need is God. Many popular preachers today are especially promoting the first two, healthy and wealthy.
In fact, according to county records, since 1999, this particular ministry has spent over $4 million on five homes for the leaders and their four children. The leader's house, the largest of the five, is a 10,000-square-foot Cape Cod style estate home with a guest house and a garage that can be independently heated and cooled and can hold up to eight cars. The three-acre property has a large fountain, a gazebo, a private putting green, a pool and a pool house where the ministry recently added a $10,000 bathroom. The ministry pays for utilities, maintenance and landscaping costs at all five homes. It also pays for renovations. Major rehab work at the ministry's expense was ordered right after the ministry bought three of the homes. For example, the ministry bought one home, leveled it and then built a new home on the site to the specifications of one of the daughters. Even the property taxes, $15,629 this year, are paid by the ministry. he leaders of this ministry say they should not have to defend how they spend the ministry's money. "We teach and preach and believe biblically that God wants to bless people who serve Him, so there's no need for us to apologize for being blessed." The fact is, many people in this world are healthy and wealthy without God's blessing. They're healthy because they have good genes, live in a relatively save environment, take care of themselves by eating well and getting good exercise, and have access to the best medical care; they're wealthy because they happen to live in an area with a strong economy, are employed in a growth industry, work hard, and are careful how they spend their money. So God's blessing may have little to do with how healthy or wealthy they may be, but with wisdom, it's a very different thing. If wisdom is seeing life from God's perspective, it can only come from Him. That's why James, right after he talks about "trials of many kinds" follows with the advice, "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." - in other words, wisdom comes when we are taught of God through the difficult and trying times. In the radio message just mentioned, the ministry leader commented that in the newspaper article about the luxurious house, some critical remarks were included, and this should be expected because, after all, even Jesus was persecuted. Well, maybe it is persecution, on the other hand, maybe God was trying to use the newspaper editors to send a message that it is not acceptable to use money that has been dedicated to ministry for the leaders to live a luxurious life style, and then proclaim that this is what Gold wants for everyone. But let's bring this closer to home. What are the difficulties you are dealing with right now? Have you become discouraged, thinking that God has abandoned you, or is punishing you? Believe me, neither is true - perhaps you're simply the recipient of a hardship that is no different from anyone else around you, or the victim of someone else's sin. The cause is not what's important. What is important is that you view this as an opportunity for God to use this circumstance for your benefit, to discipline and train you. When in the favorite, often quoted verse (Romans 8:28) Paul points out, "All things work together for good," this is the good, i.e., to be taught of God to be holy, righteous and at peace with God, yourself, and with the world.
Punishment and Discipline 1. If it's true that we tend to remember the disciplinary actions more than pleasurable experiences, why is it? 2. What is Satan's lie to us when we think that God is disciplining us? 3. Why do children so quickly dismiss their parents' claim, "I'm doing this because I love you - it hurts me more than you"? 4. What does the Proverbs (Proverbs 13:24; Proverbs 19:18) have to say about parents disciplining their children? 5. Where is "punishment" more talked about, the Old Testament or the New? Why is this so? 6. If our prisons and jails are "schools of crime," what can be done to change this image? 7. When there is trouble, problems, deprivation, hurt, loss, or any of a number of negative experiences, does it mean that God is punishing or disciplining us? 8. Why would Jesus need to "learn obedience" (Hebrews 5:8)? 9. What words are preferable to "chasten" in Hebrews 12? 10. What is the response of the child of God to correction, and what are some of the fruits of discipline? 11. In what way is discipline a matter of perspective? 12. Was Benjamin Franklin right when he penned, "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise"? 13. In terms of becoming healthy and wealthy as opposed to becoming wise, what is a major difference? 14. Is it justifiable to criticize Christian leaders who choose to live an opulent life-style? 15. If finding the cause of our hardships is not all that important, what is important? 16. What is the "good" in "All things work together for good"? - - Return to Top of this Page
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